What happens when we don’t leave our comfort zone?

Our Nest…

I was listening to a podcast recently and the conversation was about leaving the nest and moving out of your comfort zone.  The speaker was discussing the importance of coming out of your comfort zone and the need for growth.  Immediately, it made me think of a comfort zone a bird’s nest.  This leads me to my story…

Over the summer, some sparrows took up vacancy in the  exhaust pipe to our stove.  They built a nest in preparation for the birth of little sparrows.  Within days, we heard the chirping and squeals of baby sparrows.

However, several days later, I was washing a plate in the sink and noticed these little mites crawling on our counter top.  So I began tracing them and traced them back to the oven exhaust.   They were coming from the nest.  My wife did some quick research on Google to learn about these bugs.  The bugs were from the sparrows and were a sign that the birds may have died. I went outside to investigate and I placed my hand in the exhaust and pulled out the nest.  There were three baby sparrows…they were dead.

If  we don’t leave the nest, you get bugs!   If we fail to leave the nest, we fail to grow and reach out full potential. A nest is a place of safety, warmth, love, and where we feel the most confident and comfortable.   However, when we grow too comfortable and don’t move outside of the nest, the bugs come.

Moving out of the comfort zone…

As a coach, many clients are working on coming out of their comfort zone.  And it is difficult for some.  The other day a client and I discussed that he had a new neighbor who was around the same age as his son.   So my client explained how in his past he had difficulty in communicating with his own son due to a learning disorder.  He had always desired a better relationship with his son.  It was something my client struggled with for many years.  The neighbor began reaching out to spend time with my client and was seeking a father figure.  This presented him with a challenge.

My client said that his neighbor had challenged him in a way that he has never been challenged before.  When he said this, I replied with “you are being asked to come out of your comfort zone, you are being asked to grow.”  Maybe the purpose of the relationship was for my client to begin a “fatherly” relationship with this young man.  This young man  may help my client overcome his challenges with his own son.  His relationship with his own son may improve as a result of befriending this neighbor.

Now we don’t know yet how this relationship may develop or what it will yield.  However, if there is no attempt to see where it goes, the bugs will come.  The bugs will live in the nest with my client, if he is choosing not to grow, not to explore. He will miss an opportunity to have something he never had before.   Without exploring, he will not grow…the bugs will come.

We enter the world leaving the only comfort zone we know, our mothers womb.    We eventually develop new comfort zones over the course of our life because of our experiences.  As we move out of our comfort zones we experience some pain, discomfort, awkwardness and a lack of confidence.  Once we begin to explore and learn that it going to be okay, it becomes something else to be comfortable with.  As we experience these challenges, we learn more about who we are and what we are supposed to do.  When we fail to move out and learn, we are inviting the bugs.

The Challenge…

What are the bugs in your nest?  Is it fear that stops you from coming out of your comfort zone?  Does stress or awkwardness make you stay in the comfort zone?   Is it simply complacency that makes you stay where you are?   I challenge you to not be complacent,  I challenge you to explore.  Become comfortable with the uncomfortable.

Will you choose to stay in your nest?  Will you fly and allow yourself to soar?  It is in taking the risk to do something new, to experience a new way, to develop a new relationship, to take the leap of faith, that you will discover you don’t need to live with the bugs.

Do you need help coming out of your comfort zone?  Contact me at tmarino@monarchlifecoaching.com  or visit my website at www.monarchlifecoaching.com