Clarifying Your Mindset is the Important First Step on Your Journey to Change

Written by Tom Marino

June 2, 2021


Where is your mindset?

Are you… thinking positively, or spiraling into negativity? Are you… taking responsibility, or blaming others? Are you… feeling “open” and communicative, or closed off?

Our state of mind influences our thoughts, actions, and day-to-day choices. I believe that the choices we make on a daily basis have the power to change our lives. The first step in CHOICE coaching is to clarify your mindset.

Together, we uncover the answers to these questions: 

  • What’s your purpose?
  • What are your needs?
  • Where are you starting?

Over the next few weeks, we’re going to explore each of these questions to help you find clarity about who you are and what you want to do with your life.


You need to know where you’re going

You wouldn’t plan a trip without picking a destination. In the same way, you need to be honest with yourself about how you want to live your life, and where you’d like to end up.

This is a process of self-discovery. It’s difficult to make choices when your vision for yourself and your future is hazy or unclear.

Clients often seek out a Life Coach during difficult seasons of transition – a career change, or a bad breakup – because they feel frustrated, unfulfilled, or burnt out. Our coaching journey often reveals that they are not being true to themselves, because their life choices are out of alignment with their needs, their desires, and their purpose.


How to develop a “for you” mindset

Even with a destination in mind, it may be difficult to embrace change and make new choices when you’re trapped in a “fixed” mindset. Do you find yourself saying things like, “Why does this happen to me?!” 

I caution my coaching clients about this “to you” mindset. This is a self-pitying, “woe is me” mentality, and it will hold you back. When life happens “to” you, you blame someone or something else.

It’s always easier to point the finger at someone else. But when we fail to take responsibility, we stay firmly planted in our comfort zone. We are unwilling to make changes.

I advise you to make a simple but powerful mental shift; “to” you becomes “for” you.

When life happens “for” you, you give up the blame game and empower yourself. Every situation, every challenge, happens for your growth and maturity. You will learn to see opportunity in hardship.



Clarifying your mindset is the important first step on your journey to change.

This process of self-discovery requires that you (1) uncover your purpose, (2) address your needs, and (3) visualize your destination. Download the Bridge to Change app to stay up-to-date with the blog and read new posts in this series as soon as they go live.

If you’re ready to find clarity and commit to a journey of self-discovery, schedule your complimentary coaching session today.



Photo by Rob Laughter on Unsplash